Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Yes You Can! And, Believe Six Impossible Things Every Morning Before Breakfast!

Alice laughed. "There's no use trying," she said: "one can't believe impossible things."

"I daresay you haven't had much practice," said the Queen. "When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."

Alice & The White Queen in
Through the Looking Glass
by Lewis Carroll

Dear Ones,

I bought this unimaginably LONG url some time back. I started the website. Life kept encroaching. I decided to do a blog instead. I designed the outlines of this blog. It sat. I deleted it. I
undeleted it (I didn't even know that you could do that on Blogger but I'm so glad that you can. I'm apt to delete something on a whim and then want to hang myself in the tulip patch (The gnomes always get me down, scold me, and push me back in the door. Besides the many animals, there seem to be an awful lot of the wee little magical people here...). However, a couple of days ago, and in alignment with my current life circumstances, I am having to make manifest all manner of unimaginable dreams. I thought I'd take you along with me, and at the same time encourage you to do the same in your own life.

This will be a magical, whimsical, mysterious, joyous blog. This is the blog where the imp in me runs amok. This is where I pave the way for you to believe six impossible things every morning before breakfast, and then we will all work together to make these things happen!

think "Mr Ed" couldn't really talk. They had no scope for the imagination as Anne of Green Gables would have said! These same people most likely think that those "pink plastic flamingos" in people's gardens and yards are simply that, pink plastic birds on a stick. If they only knew.

I have an in with the wee folk and I'm here to tell you that those flamingos jump off their sticks and come fully alive at night and run amok making mischief everywhere. I also believe they are behind that eternal question,
"Why is it that you put TWO socks in the washing machine and only ONE comes out?" Well I'm here to tell you that I'm usually up into the weesmas (wee small hours) and I've been witness to things most people never see! Do you know that all of these flamingos frolicking round and about laughing as they turn things upside down, inside out, and then paint them all pink are ALWAYS wearing ONE sock. Now where do you think THEY came from. Believe you me, they've been in your dryer before you have!

So come along with me as I build my dream future in odd and whimsical and down to earth ways. I will show you pictures of little cottages I am looking at, the Big Whomper 8 year old 2002 4wdr with 100,000 miles on it Yukon XL and being sold to me from a dear friend for a song. I don't drive a lot but when I do I need ROOM. When you live in a tiny sea town where a hurricane might sweep the whole town away, or make of your little village the next Atlantis, and you have to load up 5 dogs, 6 parrots, all in their carriers and cages, you'd best be able to fit them in. I'm told there is seldom a hurricane here, but it would be just my luck that the biggest one in history hits 4 minutes after I move in and by gosh and by golly I'ma gonna be ready! I don't like a 4wdr because of environmental reasons, but this is used, has the room I need, and recluse that I am, I barely go anywhere at all.

A 2002 Yukon XL. Don't you think it would look
FABULOUS painted a sparkly lilac???

I've already named abovesaid vehicle Jezebel, and had just about decided to have her painted kind of a misty lilac when the current owner, my best friend Jeff, started to go into cardiac arrest. Sigh... Well, I'll spruce it up somehow. I've already decided to put a vase of flowers attached to the dashboard somehow just like the new little VW bugs have (I wanted one of those but they don't so much fit a dozen animals or so...), and I saw the little Smart Cars which look like a child's bootie and nearly gave ME a heart attack, imagining, first of all, trying to fit my Polish behind in the thing, and realizing if I could fit anything in there it would be a slip of paper, which one doesn't much need when there's no elbow room to write, and then there's the fact that a bug could squash you in the thing, and it all made me so nervous I did a wheelie in the car parking lot to get away from it, panting all the while.

I'm going to get one of those little old lady 3 wheel bikes (... with a BIG seat to ride comfortably with my abovesaid Polish arse.), which I think is a dandy way to get around a little town where everything is nearby and there's even a nice big basket to carry things...

But what I really want is the surrey model, but it costs half what I'm paying for my car... (shaking head sadly), and it even comes in red, blue or yellow, but LORD, wouldn't I look GRAND in this...

What I really like about the surrey is that is says the bench seat fits 3 people (Ha ha ha... 2 maybe...) and the front seats 2 little children with safety bars to lock them in. I figured I'd carry a coupla pugs up there for decoration and to give the little hooligans some fun, but I'm not entirely certain that they would appreciate it. But just
imagine tooling around a little town in a surrey with two pugs up front. It needs no gas, it emits no emissions, and I could wear my flamingo hat and really make an impression!

Yes, I really do have, and sometimes
wear this very hat. It's head goes way
up high and it's feet come right to
breast level. So fun the way you can
shock the socks of the neighbors if
you wear it to go out to get the mail,
but I can assure you, they'll never
bother you again...

A flamingo hat makes everything better. I wear it around the house when I'm in the doldrums, startling all the animals no end, but I tell them to buck up and get over it, we all cope in our own ways...

Well, I guess I'll close here, but next time I'll show you some of the cottages I'm looking at, and you can feel free to leave comments with your opinions, and I shall discuss how you, too, can manifest your own dreams. In the next entry after that, I shall likely write about the magical garden that I am already designing. It will be a dumpster diver/artistic paradise, and the gnomes and the flamingos will love it.

Whimsical Maitri
Who Believes In

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